What are Green Flags in a Relationship?

Are you in a new dating relationship? In college? Coming out of a divorce and no idea what to look for? Maybe you've had a lot of trauma and you frankly don't know what a good relationship is.

I took to Reddit recently to see what Redditors believe to be "green flags" in romantic relationships. If you aren't sure, or if your relationship is sturggling, consider couples therapy in Pittsburgh give us a call!

Comments have been edited for clarity, brevity, and to conceal identity

Remember, these are opinions (from Reddit!) Not a professional opinion.

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When my husband and I first started dating, we went on our second date and went back to his house and sat and talked all night long. It seemed like minutes had passed when the sun started coming up.

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They geniuniely like being able to do things to help you out and vice versa

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Adjunct to this, is enjoying their company in the car even without conversation. First few weeks of my relationship we went on a road trip. I noticed in the moment how amazing it felt just sharing the space in the car with her often for long periods of silence.

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They say that the true measure of a person is how they respond in bad times, not good times.

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My wife of 21 years and mother to our two sons said I got that second date because I was nice to her cat (I love animals and always have).

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The ability to apologize. If your partner never sees their faults, it'll never work.

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Being able to make each other laugh. Understanding the other person’s sense of humor is critical in long relationships, and besides, do you really want to get serious with someone who can’t hardly make you laugh or smile?

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When, during an argument, both parties take time to listen and respond thoughtfully to their partner and show genuine concern for the distress in their partner, even if it is small.

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Encouraging growth, but doesn't try to change your foundation.

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* Integrity. They do what they say they're going to do.

* Compatible libido level and/or compatible desires.

* Communicaton skills.

* Emotional maturity. How do they act during a disagreement? Do they call me names? Do they walk off down the street without saying anything? Can they discuss matters calmly and try to see both sides?

* Financial savvy. I didn't expect anyone to be rich, but I did desire to find someone else who lived within their means, didn't spend money they didn't have, etc.

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There's a few for me but a big one is - treats others respectfully. Is polite to service people, gives up his seat for an older person on the bus. Is kind to homeless people or any stranger. Just genuinely showing compassion in little ways.

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He's curious about learning something from you that he openly doesn't really know much about.

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Has stable (if boring) job

Solid friend group

When faced with rejection, doesn't lash out or go sour grapes

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When he drops me off back home I like when a guy waits until I get inside to leave. I don't expect to be walked to me door. But I think he should know I got inside safely. If a guy doesn't it's not necessarily a bad thing. I also think it's a mark of being chivalrous and respectful.

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Open communication

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Trusts me and supports me unconditionally

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This blog is written and maintained by non-clinical staff. Therefore, it should be taken as psychoeducation and opinion only and not as medical advice or a replacement for therapy. If you are experiencing a mental health crisis that is life-threatening, please call 911. For a mental health crisis that is not life-threatening, call 988.